How to learn if your partner is hiding something.


We never know everything about someone. Everyone has a past, and they don’t necessarily share it with us. Romantic partners are no different. In fact, it’s pretty common for people to keep secrets from their significant others. 

There are all sorts of reasons why your partner might hide something from you. Maybe they’re embarrassed about something from their past, or maybe they don’t want to worry you needlessly. Unfortunately, the secrets of their past may be a predictor for issues that could come up in the relationship. For example, if someone has cheated in the past, they may be more likely to cheat again. 

Here are a few ways to tell if your partner may be hiding something from you: 

They’re unusually private about their phone or computer. 

Partners who are hiding something from their significant others may become unusually private about their phones or computers. They may not let you see what they’re doing on their devices, and they may take them with them whenever they leave the house. Additionally, they may start using passwords or PINs that you don’t know about. 

According to one study, people who were found to be hiding information from their partner were also more likely to use their phones in private, and they were less likely to let their partner see what was on their screen. 

If your partner suddenly becomes secretive about their phone or computer usage, it may be worth asking them about it.

They’re evasive when you ask them questions. 

If you notice that your partner is being evasive when you ask them questions, it may be a sign that they’re hiding something from you. For example, if you ask them about their day and they give you a vague answer instead of telling you what they did, it may mean that they don’t want to share everything with you. 

People who are hiding something may also avoid eye contact or change the subject when asked certain questions. If you notice that your partner is doing this, it may be worth asking them directly if there’s something they’re not telling you. 

They have sudden changes in behavior. 

Sudden changes in behavior can also be a sign that someone is hiding something from their partner. For example, if your partner is normally outgoing but suddenly starts withdrawing from social activities, it may mean that they’re not being honest with you about something. 

Additionally, people who keep secrets often go through a lot of stress and anxiety. This can lead to changes in sleeping and eating patterns, as well as mood swings. These changes in behavior can be due to many reasons, such as stress or mental strain, but combined with other signs, they could also be indicative of something more sinister. 

If you notice any sudden changes in your partner’s behavior, it may be worth asking them if something is wrong and seeing if the answer is legitimate or deflection.

They seem distant or preoccupied. 

One of the signs that a partner may be hiding something is if they seem distant or preoccupied. This can manifest in a lot of different ways, such as by spending less time with you, being less talkative or withdrawn, or seeming distracted. 

According to some studies, people who are hiding something from their partner are also more likely to be distant and preoccupied. For example, one study from 2015 found that people who were keeping secrets from their partners were less likely to share personal thoughts and feelings with them. 

Additionally, another study found that people who were lying to their partners were more likely to have changes in their physiology, such as increases in heart rate and blood pressure. 

They Always Change the Subject

People who are hiding something from their partners often change the subject when asked certain questions. This can be a sign that they’re not comfortable talking about what they’re hiding, and it may be a clue that you should investigate further.

There are some reasons why people might change the subject when asked about something. For example, they might not want to talk about it because they don’t want to get into an argument. Alternatively, they may not have all the information and they’re trying to avoid giving a false answer.

However, if you notice that your partner changes the subject every time you ask them about a certain topic, it may be worth asking them directly if there’s something they’re not telling you.

What to Do If They Won’t Open Up

Unfortunately, we can’t always get our partner to tell us what’s going on, even if we think they’re hiding something.

There are a few things you can try if your partner seems to be hiding something but won’t open up to you. 

Do a Background Check

If you’re worried about a partner’s past, but they won’t tell you anything, the last resort is to do a background check on them. This can be expensive, and it may not tell you everything you want to know, but it can give you some peace. Background checks will look at criminal records, civil judgments, and other public records.

Google Them

You can also try Googling your partner’s name and seeing what comes up. If there are any flagrant red flags, such as a criminal record or arrest record, it will usually show up here.

Social Media

Check out their social media. If they’re hiding something, they may not want to it’s possible there is evidence of whatever that is on their platforms of choice. 

Talk to a Friend or Family Member

If you’re really worried about what your partner is hiding, you can try talking to a friend or family member. They may have some insight into what’s going on, and they can help you figure out what to do next.


If you’re noticing any signs that your partner may be hiding something from you, it’s worth asking them about it directly. This can be a difficult, but it’s important to know if there are issues in your relationship that need to be addressed. By talking to your partner openly and honestly, you may be able to resolve whatever is causing them to keep secrets from you.


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